What is the funniest/most stupid comment you ever got? [Part 2]

[Mr. Know]

Originally Posted by Man of Steel

My assistant asked me to enter my Elise in the July 4 Lexington County Peach Festival Parade in sleepy little Gilbert, SC. Hey, what the heck, it's their 50th anniversary and registration was free!

Elisewidow and I arrived at the parade staging area and parked in our assigned spot.

We were immediately surrounded by admirers asking the usual Lotus questions, which we enjoy. After several groups of oglers left, a very nice gentlemen in his 60's from the float in front of us approached and expressed his life-long admiration for all things Lotus. He grew up in northern England, had always been a fan, owned a restored Triumph, but had a life-long yearning to own a Lotus.

So I suggested, "Meet us after the parade and we'll go for little ride."

After the parade (see my wife's separate post), we met up in the parking lot and took off down a country road for a little fun

We pulled into a big empty parking lot of a mega-church so I could demonstrate the potential of the car in a relatively safe environment.

Let's just say he now knows what Lotus handling is all about.

For 15 minutes I watched this gentleman turn back into a little boy! He was hooting and hollering and had a blast - and so did I!

I LOVE this car!!

My wife suggested next year that my car be the parade car for my kid's school in our 4th of July parade. After some thought, I'm not 100% sure a British car in a parade celebrating our independence from England is appropriate or not...

And my German neighbor was exactly like the guy you gave a ride to, even though he's in his 80's. He loved every single second of a spirited ride along.

[Man of Steel]

Originally Posted by Mr. Know

My wife suggested next year that my car be the parade car for my kid's school in our 4th of July parade. After some thought, I'm not 100% sure a British car in a parade celebrating our independence from England is appropriate or not...

Elise Widow and I had the same discussion, but decided:

1.) Great Britain is our strongest ally right now (especially in the war on terror)

2.) The crowd will love the Lotus

At the end of the parade the car behind us was happy we entered because it brought more attention to them! (Lexington County Arts Festival)

Hope you had a happy Independance Day!

[Man of Steel]

Originally Posted by lotusport

Evidently.

(Me too.)

Me three.

[ezmoney]

Originally Posted by Mr. Know

My wife suggested next year that my car be the parade car for my kid's school in our 4th of July parade. After some thought, I'm not 100% sure a British car in a parade celebrating our independence from England is appropriate or not...

And my German neighbor was exactly like the guy you gave a ride to, even though he's in his 80's. He loved every single second of a spirited ride along.

You're not sure about a British car in a parade celebrating our independence from England, but you give a ride to a German in a British car driven by an American! How ironic and humorous at the same time. I seem to recall us and the Brits having two wars with Germany.

[xtn]

Originally Posted by Monsi

"wannabe vette"???
thats like saying sushi is a "wannabe balogna sandwich"

Bad analogy. Sushi could never approach a bologna sandwich for pure eating pleasure. I say that as a person who doesn't really care much for bologna.

xtn

[kg4izw]

OK,
This is my first post here in LT... here goes.

I went in to the Porsche dealer here in town to look for an Elise since we have no Lotus dealer in Alabama.
I walk over to the lady behind the counter. She asks, "Can I help you?"
I say, "I am looking for a Lotus Elise."
She says, "A what?"
I respond, "A Lotus Elise."
She turns to a salesman who is just walking up and says, "This guy is looking for the lowest lease."
I promptly turn and walk out the door.
Only in Alabama!!!

[Bavarian Motorist]

Originally Posted by xtn

Bad analogy. Sushi could never approach a bologna sandwich for pure eating pleasure. I say that as a person who doesn't really care much for bologna.

xtn

You got that backwards bud!

[Bavarian Motorist]

Originally Posted by kg4izw

OK,
This is my first post here in LT... here goes.

I went in to the Porsche dealer here in town to look for an Elise since we have no Lotus dealer in Alabama.
I walk over to the lady behind the counter. She asks, "Can I help you?"
I say, "I am looking for a Lotus Elise."
She says, "A what?"
I respond, "A Lotus Elise."
She turns to a salesman who is just walking up and says, "This guy is looking for the lowest lease."
I promptly turn and walk out the door.
Only in Alabama!!!

I'd take a trip to Florida for that. Jacksonville has a dealer.

[serpent]

yesterday i went with my gf to her parents house for a bbq. My gf sister thought it would also be fun to invite her ex. So we'r all doing the bbq thing eating and chillen out and having fun. Then my gf ex wanting to show off talks about how he used to street race when he was young and how good he was and stuff like that. My gfs dad is into cars a lot. So the ex was showing off by talking about cars and saying he was such a good driver. At one point i just couldnt hold my laughter in and i just started laughing. Then the ex gets angry at me and says blablabla i have a M3 and i'm better than you. This makes me laugh even more...i'm pretty much to the point where i should be rolling on the floor laughing. Then he goes on to add that i can never even afford a M3...at this point i need to tell myself to breath because i'm laughing so much. Considering this was the first time me meeting the parents i guess it was bad to laugh at the guy but i didnt care. Then he starts talking **** about my turbo'd corolla ()....so then i stop laughing and start talking about cars and i go on him to the point where hes looking like he might cry. Then at the end i tell him that i have a Sti and a M6 also...lol

[serpent]

Originally Posted by kg4izw

OK,
This is my first post here in LT... here goes.

I went in to the Porsche dealer here in town to look for an Elise since we have no Lotus dealer in Alabama.
I walk over to the lady behind the counter. She asks, "Can I help you?"
I say, "I am looking for a Lotus Elise."
She says, "A what?"
I respond, "A Lotus Elise."
She turns to a salesman who is just walking up and says, "This guy is looking for the lowest lease."
I promptly turn and walk out the door.
Only in Alabama!!!

lol...thats just funny

[Monsi]

Originally Posted by serpent

yesterday i went with my gf to her parents house for a bbq. My gf sister thought it would also be fun to invite her ex. So we'r all doing the bbq thing eating and chillen out and having fun. Then my gf ex wanting to show off talks about how he used to street race when he was young and how good he was and stuff like that. My gfs dad is into cars a lot. So the ex was showing off by talking about cars and saying he was such a good driver. At one point i just couldnt hold my laughter in and i just started laughing. Then the ex gets angry at me and says blablabla i have a M3 and i'm better than you. This makes me laugh even more...i'm pretty much to the point where i should be rolling on the floor laughing. Then he goes on to add that i can never even afford a M3...at this point i need to tell myself to breath because i'm laughing so much. Considering this was the first time me meeting the parents i guess it was bad to laugh at the guy but i didnt care. Then he starts talking **** about my turbo'd corolla ()....so then i stop laughing and start talking about cars and i go on him to the point where hes looking like he might cry. Then at the end i tell him that i have a Sti and a M6 also...lol

I guess he paid more for his M3 than you paid for your M6? sucks to be him

[Mr. Know]

Originally Posted by ezmoney

You're not sure about a British car in a parade celebrating our independence from England, but you give a ride to a German in a British car driven by an American! How ironic and humorous at the same time. I seem to recall us and the Brits having two wars with Germany.

Hadn't thought of that...

[cornbeef]

I've had a few in the last week. Parking lot in Philly last week.
Attendent: how much did you lower it?
Me: huh?
Attendent: So is it like that stock or did you lower it.
Me: it comes like this
Attendent: Nice car
Me: Thanks

Then I made an appointment for its inspection at the shop across from my office. They know me so the lady asks which Audi I'm bringing, I tell her its my Lotus. She askes me when I got it and then asked 'so how do the doors open on that?"

Finally stopped at Cabellas with the wife and her parents last sunday. I hadn't even got out of the car when a 5 series pulled up behind me and when I got out a father and a kid about 8 were standing there
The dad says sorry but he saw you pulling in and he just loves anything exotic so we couldn't resist stopping. I was like ok and I asked the kid if he wanted to sit in it.
The kid shakes his head but the dad encouraged him so he gets in. At this point the mom is out also thanking me and telling me I made his year. The dad pulls out his camera to take a picture so I took the roof off so he can get a better picture of the kid. Its nice when people are appreciative.

[cornbeef]

When I picked up the car from inspection there was a couple discussing the Lotus with the mechanic. I'm trying not to get involved in the conversation as I needed to get back to work. So I head out to get it and there is a Miata parking me in. The lady who was discussing the Elise came over to move it. At this point I'm showing some other people the car when the husband walks over talking loud enough to be heard but trying to act discrete and let it be known he knows what he's talking about. He says something like I have to ask about it and comes over. He asked what year it was and I told him an 06, to which he told me that they had stopped building them in 03. He then tried to tell me some history and that they were still not available. Even though I usually love talking to people at this point I really started to ignore him and left. At least he said nice car though as I drove away. All I can think of he that he is thinking about Esprits. I just want to people who think they know and don't want to be educated.

[rcw82]

Originally Posted by serpent

yesterday i went with my gf to her parents house for a bbq. My gf sister thought it would also be fun to invite her ex. So we'r all doing the bbq thing eating and chillen out and having fun. Then my gf ex wanting to show off talks about how he used to street race when he was young and how good he was and stuff like that. My gfs dad is into cars a lot. So the ex was showing off by talking about cars and saying he was such a good driver. At one point i just couldnt hold my laughter in and i just started laughing. Then the ex gets angry at me and says blablabla i have a M3 and i'm better than you. This makes me laugh even more...i'm pretty much to the point where i should be rolling on the floor laughing. Then he goes on to add that i can never even afford a M3...at this point i need to tell myself to breath because i'm laughing so much. Considering this was the first time me meeting the parents i guess it was bad to laugh at the guy but i didnt care. Then he starts talking **** about my turbo'd corolla ()....so then i stop laughing and start talking about cars and i go on him to the point where hes looking like he might cry. Then at the end i tell him that i have a Sti and a M6 also...lol

You need to shoot your gf's sister.

[holmz]

Originally Posted by serpent

yesterday i went with my gf to her parents house for a bbq. My gf sister thought it would also be fun to invite her ex. So we'r all doing the bbq thing eating and chillen out and having fun. Then my gf ex wanting to show off talks about how he used to street race when he was young and how good he was and stuff like that. My gfs dad is into cars a lot. So the ex was showing off by talking about cars and saying he was such a good driver. At one point i just couldnt hold my laughter in and i just started laughing. Then the ex gets angry at me and says blablabla i have a M3 and i'm better than you. This makes me laugh even more...i'm pretty much to the point where i should be rolling on the floor laughing. Then he goes on to add that i can never even afford a M3...at this point i need to tell myself to breath because i'm laughing so much. Considering this was the first time me meeting the parents i guess it was bad to laugh at the guy but i didnt care. Then he starts talking **** about my turbo'd corolla ()....so then i stop laughing and start talking about cars and i go on him to the point where hes looking like he might cry. Then at the end i tell him that i have a Sti and a M6 also...lol

Do you usually take the high road?

[serpent]

Originally Posted by rcw82

You need to shoot your gf's sister.

shes cool....she just likes to have fun. After this whole episode me and her was chillen laughing at him drinking a beer

Originally Posted by holmz

Do you usually take the high road?

sometimes....i'm not an angry person so i wouldnt have gotten mad at the guy. It was just funny to me so i just laughed . If the situation required me to get serious and kick the guys ass i would've done just that (for example if he talked about my family).

[ChrisH]

1) Tonight I was driving home and came upon a DUI checkpoint. The first cop I came to yelled out to the second cop further down the line "No front plate". (I live in California, which requires a front plate.) The second one just laughed loudly and yelled back "It's a Lotus" and waved me on through.

2) I went to our local fireworks show, and as I was leaving, there were a bunch of young teens standing in the parking lot a few parking spaces away from my car.
Teen: "You're badass!"
Me: "Well, at least my car is."
Teen: "No, you are."

[FLuXeXigeS]

Originally Posted by serpent

yesterday i went with my gf to her parents house for a bbq. My gf sister thought it would also be fun to invite her ex. So we'r all doing the bbq thing eating and chillen out and having fun. Then my gf ex wanting to show off talks about how he used to street race when he was young and how good he was and stuff like that. My gfs dad is into cars a lot. So the ex was showing off by talking about cars and saying he was such a good driver. At one point i just couldnt hold my laughter in and i just started laughing. Then the ex gets angry at me and says blablabla i have a M3 and i'm better than you. This makes me laugh even more...i'm pretty much to the point where i should be rolling on the floor laughing. Then he goes on to add that i can never even afford a M3...at this point i need to tell myself to breath because i'm laughing so much. Considering this was the first time me meeting the parents i guess it was bad to laugh at the guy but i didnt care. Then he starts talking **** about my turbo'd corolla ()....so then i stop laughing and start talking about cars and i go on him to the point where hes looking like he might cry. Then at the end i tell him that i have a Sti and a M6 also...lol

bigger picture, u win u got the girl

[morphic]

Went to Autozone yesterday to get an MIL code read (O2 sensor failed) and:

He said: that car gives me a hard-on
I said: I've heard that before
He said: I bet you're not married
I said: actually, my wife wants to race me
He said: what kind of car does she have?
I said: an M3 - she's just kidding me for having a 4-cylinder Toyota engine
He said: how fast does it go?
I said: about 150, but more importantly it can do 1G on a skid pad
He said: how many cops have you outrun?
Me:
I said: the opportunity has yet to present itself