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99 Problems
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223 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
$50k

Not gonna lie, I thought I'd keep this car forever. I've wanted it since I was a teen but at 35 with a 1 year old and hopefully another on the way soon, it just doesn't make sense to have this and an Emira. What? You thought I was selling it to get some white new balance shoes and knee socks? haha

Seriously though, it's gonna rip my heart out to see someone else drive away in this car but it's time to say goodbye. I'm also selling a kidney if anybody is interested because I'm going to need a plane ticket and a ton of gas to take delivery of the next toy if and when it ever gets here.

I'm the third owner and I've owned it since 2015. The second owner only had it a few months, lost his job, and couldn't afford to keep it. I bought it with 15k miles on the odometer, so yeah, I've put roughly 5k miles a year on it for the last 6 years (math is fun). All of the miles I've put on have been weekend drives in sunny weather, minus the one time that @sshole on the radio said 0% chance of rain and it poured. It has never been tracked and is pretty much a garage queen. Many fellow Lotus drivers in the area (some probably reading this) can attest that this car has been really taken care of the last 6 years. There are a few cosmetic scratches, dings, and blemishes in the paint but this is to be expected for a 16 year old car that's still being driven. The engine is totally stock but I've added a few things to the overall appearance. Clean and clear title in hand and I'm not taking a penny less than my asking price because jokes aside, I'm not actually pressed to sell.

The price includes some "On" and "Off" car extras. I'm probably missing some stuff here but I promise, I have a giant storage bin full of goodies, and it's all yours.

Original Owner's Manual (Worth $50k alone apparently)
2X Unikey (Highly overpriced Key with built in Fob)

On Car:
Powder Coated (Gloss Black) OEM LSS Wheels
Powder Coated (Gloss Red) OEM Brake Calipers
Upgraded Bluetooth Capable Stereo
Upgraded Memphis Speakers (rear and dash)
Upgraded 12v socket
Hard top with all original hardware (fabric linear and padding removed)
GRP Wheel Studs
GRP Front Clam Lotus Badge
GRP Steering Wheel Lotus Badge
GRP Wheel Cap Lotus Badges
GRP Carbon fiber matte side scoops
GRP Carbon fiber matte steering column
GRP Carbon fiber matte mirror cover panels
GB Composites Carbon fiber matte fuel door
Evora Raised Lotus Lettering (rear)
HID Headlight Kit
Hella Horns (From Chihuahua to German Shepherd with the push of button)
TRD Badge (For all the haters, this actually added 20 extra hp)

Off Car:
Jack Helper - Yes, the Jack is off
Soft top cover with braces
Extra set of rare black pearl access panels
Extra set of GRP Carbon Fiber matte side scoops
All the OEM pieces removed for GRP Carbon Fiber pieces
Front clam license plate mount (tow bolt)
OEM Front tire mud flapper thingys
OEM Horn
OEM Stereo

Work Done:
Oil Changes
Air Filter Replacements
Brake Rotors
Brake Pads
Brake Lines Flushed
Transmission Flushed
Radiator Flushed
Tires Replaced
Passenger Side Oil Cooler Replaced
Blower Motor Switch Hack performed with switch relocated under passenger side access panel
*All Lotus recalls were performed prior to me purchasing it so I had it confirmed by Lotus in Bethesda, Maryland (before they shut down).

Test drives are absolutely welcomed and encouraged but not without proof that you're married to Kate Beckinsale and have an uncanny ability of convincing her that she loves out of shape bald guys with ginger beards. Otherwise, I'll be more than happy to take you for a spin and let you hear, see, touch, and smell how loud, tiny, and bare bones this car is. FYI, if you're a grown ass man, no fiber beforehand, and we're unintentionally bumping elbows, sorry not sorry.

I know I don't have to say it (especially to other Lotus drivers) but for those that have never driven or owned one, this is a fun car and I'm sure whoever gets it will enjoy it for many years to come. It's timeless, it's flashy, and it gets a lot of attention. Brace yourself because every car around you at a light will whip out their cellphones to send their friends a picture of the Ferrari they just saw. Also, every knuckle dragger in a civic to a minivan will try to convince you to race em'.

Money talks and bullsh!t walks. I don't care if your cousin Billy knows a guy who knows a guy that's selling a 2008 Exige that barely kissed a guard rail and jersey wall for $48k. This car is $50k because that's how much I'm selling it for. My bad if your name's Billy...

I'm happy to answer any questions here (TC = TA).

Cheers!

Garage is not for sale

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Well done ad and funny as hell!
 
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The Blue Meanie - 2006 Polar Blue Elise & Bernice - 2010 Chilli Red Mini Cooper S
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1,290 Posts
Dude! Screw the car! How much for the giant Eddie? LOL!

Best for sale ad I've ever seen. Wish I was in the market. It's a beautiful ride. Wish you all the best with the sale!

P.S. I got me a Trooper covid mask. Piece Of Mind was my first album.....
 

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2009 Elise SC
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200 Posts
Oh man, I had to read that twice. BAT should try some ads like this…

Sweet Elise.
 

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7,257 Posts

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Administrator
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7,257 Posts

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The Blue Meanie - 2006 Polar Blue Elise & Bernice - 2010 Chilli Red Mini Cooper S
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