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I've just received my latest AutoWeek and discovered a very short Chris Bungle interview here. Upon reading it became clear what his true mastery is: double-talk (perhaps this explains his current success with BMW..). After extensive research and linguistic deconstruction, I hereby present a translation of his comments so that we may all understand what he was trying not to say.

The original article, along with the translation, is reproduced below for your reading convenience. Enjoy!

AutoWeek’s fast five: BMW design chief Chris Bangle talks

By AUTOWEEK (translation by Alan)

BMW DESIGN CHIEF CHRIS BANGLE splits opinion like no other. Immediately following the Frankfurt motor show premier of his latest work, the all-new 6 Series, the 46-year-old American and 10-year BMW veteran spoke with AutoWeek correspondent Richard Yarrow:

AW: Why do you think there’s criticism of your designs?

BANGLE: I think it’s much to do with the fact that we have these extremely provocative cars and that we were doing this at a time when the whole subject of change as reported in the media was not on the same wavelength as we were.

TRANSLATION: It's because we made these ugly cars and we were extremely out-of-touch with what people want.

AW: Do you worry some of your designs haven’t been well received by the public?

BANGLE: We’re not creating fashion icons and it’s not an issue whether or not we have become everybody’s darling. It’s difficult for me to imagine, in the history of cars at a time of change, that we are doing anything different to anybody else. Many vehicles that we look at today with romanticism, when they came out they were very provocative. They invoked this love-hate relationship that’s assigned to us today.

TRANSLATION: I don't care if people don't like my ugly cars. I don't know why, we came out with new models like everybody else. Many classic cars were great when they came out. I'm dreaming that this relates to my designs somehow.

AW: We’ve seen spy shots of the facelifted 7 Series already, which is earlier than normal. How does that make you feel?

BANGLE: We facelift all our cars. It’s part of the model cycle and it was always planned that way.

TRANSLATION: No comment.

AW: Tell us about the cabrio version of 6 Series.

BANGLE: It will be at the Detroit show in January, but I’m not really supposed to talk about it yet. It will have a very interesting roof, great coupe-like lines, some unique features—which is important—and it’s basically very sexy.

TRANSLATION: It will be shown soon. I'm hoping to blunt its impact on you by disobeying company orders and telling you that it will have a very bizarre roof, look similar to a car yet different, and I love robots.

AW: What is the future for BMW design?

BANGLE: We will continue to evolve our philosophy. We all believe cars are truly important in our lives and are solutions to problems, not problems that need solutions.

TRANSLATION: I'm going to try something new. They all are going to fire me unless I can determine the solution to the problems I've caused.

insert clever title here
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I actually really like the styling of most of the new BMWs. The only feature that I find awkward is the trunklid treatment, especially on the 7 series. The Z4 is a beautiful design (follow each line on it closely sometime); the 6-series is gorgeous.
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