REALLY Touchless...
Hmmm. I actually refer to touchless car washes as washless car washes. Plus, I've never been through one that did even a half ass job of cleaning a car, and I can't imagine that high jet speed water spraying on your car would be any less damaging than a soft cloth wash.
Several weeks ago, I took my wife's Smart ForTwo thru a car wash at the gas station. I really just wanted to get the major winter crud off it - especially the read window and tailgate. As with most cars like this, the rear end of the car (being a low-pressure area) gets filthy, and we have to get into the tailgate all the time.
I pulled into the car wash, and it started up. The sprayer column got the front of the car, the left side.... and then moved about 10 feet behind the car, and sprayed... hitting nothing. It didn't even get the rear end of the car wet! It then proceeded to do the right side of the car. I brought the car home, acceptably clean on three of four sides.
I'll do it by hand, as time and weather allows...